The school final push is here!
I’ve been having school non-stop since last September, and pushing myself to work hard. This last exam is stressing me out because I need a certain percentage, and as a former political science student, kinesiology is difficult. I’m very tired. My exam is this Thursday. I think after this exam, I’m going to hibernate for a few days. Stress, stress, stress.
This upcoming year doesn’t look peaceful either; I’m planning to do a medical assistant certificate on the side while still attending university. Two schools at the same time. The medical assistant certificate will help me gain experience (and income) and while waiting for acceptance into further schooling for nursing. It is frustrating dealing with administration and bureaucratic policies. It is ironic how the province is in desperate need of healthcare professionals, yet there is such a long wait list for the qualifications. I just want to move on in life. The sooner I finish school, the sooner I can move out of this shitty town.
On a side note, I’ve been considering doing field nursing as a possibility. It is very low commitment (1-2 days a week), high pay and benefits, and allows me to have a life. I want to have a life. I don’t want a job that forces me to be consumed entirely and sucks the life out of me. I don’t want to be working full-time for the rest of my life and never fulfilling my passions or enjoying life. A career is important, but I don’t want it to be the defining aspect of me. It makes me sad that we go to school to slave away at a job for the rest of our lives. I mean, even if you absolutely love your job, doing it everyday is bound to be repetitive. Repetition doesn’t allow growth or new learning.
I just find field nursing exciting. You’ll never know when to expect. The problem is, what if I get sent to a war zone? What if a certain president starts a war that Canada is dragged into? But I enjoy the “no bullshit, don’t talk just do” environment. I don’t want the emotional family begging me to save a life. I want the nitty gritty “I’m going to try and save your life, if I fail I will move on the the next person asap without a word”. I don’t want the bullshit, I don’t want the emotions, I don’t want the coddling and sweet talk. The only barrier I have between it is that I’ll have to work on the physical requirement. I’d have to be more physically fit. I’d prefer to be more fit than the minimum physical requirements due to the nature of the field. Side note: field nurses get trained on how to use guns and rifles!! So badass!! But the possibility of being killed needs some serious thought. It sounds like something I’d be proud of, saving the lives of our country’s most bravest people. I’d rather not deal with spoiled brats in an overly sanitized environment and sugarcoating everything. Field nursing is a zero bullshit, zero sugarcoating, think and act fast environment. I’m a compassionate person, but I don’t want to hold someone’s hand and gently tell them about their illness in the most vague way possible. My compassion means if your leg needs to be amputated asap, I will do it asap. I will not gently comfort you beforehand and sugar coat like “due to this happening it resulted in this and the infection has spread from here to here….” blah blah. I’d rather go like “Sir, your leg is infected and I’m cutting it off to save your life” *chop*.
But the possibility of danger in the field holds me back (other than the physical requirement lol). If I start a family, I don’t want to die in war and leave them behind. I also know that if I do decided to go into field nursing, there will be some resistance from my loved ones.